He is the World’s most underdeveloped man. His physique does not worry him however, and Adonis usually forms part of our advance party due to his singular ability of being able to arrive by fax (if anyone has a fax machine!)
Alan: The 5th drummer. We always need someone to bash the drums
Prior to Alan joining, The Fabulous Fezheads previously had four drummers of various levels of virtuosity who (for many reasons) chucked in the towel; “Musical” differences, getting a better position, a hissy fit, or a sudden burst of realisation!
So Alan went along to the audition with a rather nice red drum kit. That seemed to clinch the deal and he’s been the Fabulous Fezheads’ drummer ever since.
Alan is also part responsible for our social media and produced the fine animation videos (see link on front page) for the Fezheads
He’s only tiny and rarely features in the band photos as he’s usually hidden at the back with the eye candy posing at the front.
Dr Roger Carnage. He Is Welsh!
Trained at Paddington station whilst trying to return to the Land of his Fathers. Highly accomplished in the prodigious use of his enormous weapon, his most famous achievement is, erm, let me think on that
Father Ken. Our Youngest Member!
After serving his apprenticeship in various sides in the South of England, Ken saw the light and joined the Fezheads. He is ever keen to pass on his experience and knowledge to his younger associates and they are ever keen to completely ignore him.
Gobby Fez. Possibly our most outspoken member!
Not known for his quiet demeanour, Gobby provides commentary during Fezheads performances, providing witticisms and observations with a wide ranging degree of success. He doesn’t like to unintentionally upset or offend as Gobby firmly believes everyone has an equal right to be offended and outraged. Gobby used to be entrusted with the education of the youth of our Nation. I think we got out of it relatively unscathed.
Jonny Fez. He went, but returned
Jonny returned to the bosom of his Fezhead buddies. Always keen to enter into debates and discussions about absolutely any topic, some of which he might possibly have some knowledge of.
Manu Fez. He’s anybody’s for a vino tinto!
Manu comes from one of Britain’s oldest families and can trace his roots back to the Spanish Inquisition when his family provided Bed & Board to the travelling band of inquisitors.
Phil Fez. Our former Glorious Leader
Phil the Hun (nicknamed due to his artistry with throwing knives at the Wheel of Death) has musical abilities that continue to stun, amaze and perplex people all over the country. He never lets a good tune get in the way of a pint of beer and the speed of his fingers over his instrument is matched only by the number of bum notes emanating from it.
Scouser Fez. Shiny shoes
Jim the Scouse is our highly acclaimed skipping choreographer. Basically he’s the only one who can remember the steps. You’ll hear him carefully guiding the other Fezheads through the intricate sequences of our performances with that unmistakable scouse twang. Jim is also the senior member of the Fezhead Skipping Standards Regulatory Board which ensures we never breach (or exceed) any expectations.
Snake HipsLegs like Lemmings!
Shaking Snake Hips was originally spotted across a crowded dance floor proudly sporting his snake skin boots with 24 carat toecaps. The glance was fleeting however, as the bevvy of beauties surrounding him only offered the minutist opportunity to admire his dancing style which was obviously reserved for those closest to him.
Special Guest Star FezA belly dance anyone?
In true Forties Screen Idol Fashion, we bring you our own Special Guest Star Fez! To attempt to address the obvious sexual inequality in the Fezheads, Lynne is actually a…female! All you lovely ladies out there that dream of joining the Fezheads, please do not think this has set a precedent.
Young Roger. Road Manager aka Gopher!
We had to call YR young as Carnage is also a Roger. However, it would almost be medically impossible to not be younger than Carnage (apart from Father Ken, but he’s being investigated by medical science). When not lumping stuff about he can often be seen shaking a tambourine or bongo-ing like mad!
Scaryfez. Well he sure scares the hell out of me!
Scaryfez has been renamed Zombie Fez by Gobby due to regularly dying but (owing to the marvellous NHS) he lives on! Due to this rather annoying habit however, Scary has been absent over the last few years, missing many practice sessions, which actually made no difference whatsoever!
